Who Am I? Who Will I Become?

NGCSU Commencement speech, Fall 2005
By Carol A. Miller, PT, PhD, GCS
 

President Potter, administrators, members of the faculty, family and friends, and you the graduates of the Class of 2005:  It is a privilege to be here and address you on this commencement ceremony. It is never an easy task to speak before such a diverse audience – I can only hope that I will offer kind and simple words that might inspire you today...

As I first began thinking of what to share with you today, I found myself reflecting on my first college graduation experience – now over 20 years ago. I remember feeling an incredible sense of pride for accomplishing such an ominous task - that of attaining a college degree. But at that time, I also remember feeling a little frightened and even anxious – for I had a new role attached to my identity that was very unfamiliar. I was simply no longer a daughter, a sister, a grandchild, a friend, a waitress - NOW I was a physical therapist and was embarking on a career path... “Now what am I going to do? How did I even get here? Sure it took hard work and dedication, but do you ever simply step back and wonder?” When I think about that time in my life and the many pathways that I have traveled upon since then, I decided to speak to about discovering one’s SELF – by asking who am I? Who will I become? Because I am a health care provider and an educator, I would like to talk about discovering self from the perspective of well-being.

First – let me speak about wellbeing by exploring the question - Who am I? When one thinks about “Graduation,” it is a time to reflect on the end of a journey. It is during these times that we often reflect on our accomplishments, which reveal for a brief moment - a piece of who we are. Yet, for many of us, no matter how small or great, we find it difficult to give credit for who we are – so often we try to hide those parts of self that are most essential. Let me give you an example: Robert Fulghum tells a story, that I have surmised is about identity, in his book Everything I needed to know I learned in Kindergarten. First, he surveys a group of five year old children – by asking them – how many of you are artists? How many of you are astronauts? How many are dancers? How many of you are beautiful? How many are strong? What Mr. Fulghum discovers is that the children raise their hands to almost every question. He then asks a group of 16 year old young adults the very same questions... What he finds is that only one or two hands, if any, are raised for each question...

I’m sure that there are quite a few ways to interpret Fulghum’s experiment... At the outset, it is readily clear that any chosen pathway or career must eventually be laid with knowledge and skill – one cannot claim to be something without credibility, growth and effort. But how often, I wonder, are our expectations altered by an attitude that only a Pulitzer-prize winner can be a writer, or only someone ‘famous’ can be called an actor or a musician or only models are beautiful. Are we simply being humble or are we unwilling to accept credit for other aspects of self that make us “whole?” Maybe, what I am most concerned about in reflecting on Fulgham’s experiment is that society’s expectations may be excessive and may not be fostering positive self regard. The WHO defines health as a feeling of positive regard physically, emotionally, cognitively, socially and spiritually – more than the absence of illness. A healthy sense of self then is much more than one’s social role and worldly success. I am happy to say then that health depends on one’s intellectual capability and growth. For that, we are quite comfortable recognizing cognitive identity in school settings – in fact this ceremony is based upon that very premise. But in today’s world - I am more uneasy that somewhere in the discovery of self from childhood to adulthood, we have lost site of our Inner Self: our BEAUTY– physically and emotionally. We often compare ourselves to weak media standards. I am also saddened that we may be forgetting to foster spirituality – we argue about our spiritual differences instead of seeking our commonalities. Finally, 9/11, the War in Iraq, and natural disasters such as Katrina remind us that we are lacking in addressing the social ills and injustices occurring in this nation, which can all lead to negative regard for self. If one cannot readily own a positive regard inwardly – then how can you make a difference in others and the world around you? Each one of us has purpose no matter how great or small…

Quite possibly, if we want to better envision the essence of self, the second question to ask on this day is even more important than asking who am I? At graduation, the question to really ask is: “Who will I become?” for that bears the true essence of COMMENCEMENT – a new beginning. Becoming must be driven by hopes, dreams, and measurable goals for the future. As a geriatrician, I have had numerous opportunities to listen and learn from our elders on what makes someone become... “[story] No one goes to the grave...?  Clearly, it was my first real life-lesson - a fruitful and worthwhile career is important to self worth; sharing your life and experience with others is essential (family, friends, etc.)

I must also tell you that one of the most difficult aspects of being and becoming is learning to avoid complacency and idleness. While taking a college prep course in high school one of my teachers once said: “If you are bored, it’s because you are boring.” I guess then, BECOMING is not easy! Today at this graduation and time of great accomplishment it is hard to imagine that any of you will allow boredom to set in - but you will... Not just in your work, but perhaps in your relationships, your marriage, in your parenting... (At my age – boredom is called a midlife crisis) So what does one do about that?? How does one BECOME?  Inspiration of others (Sherri/Scot..)

So today, at first, you may have difficulty realizing the importance of your NEW identity as a graduate... you’ll search for the best job for you, re-establish relationships that withered while dedicating so much time to school, and find new loves personally and professionally... But after you have settled in, remind yourself of this: You do not have to pay a price to continue to grow and expand intellectually, physically, socially, and spiritually - for the mind, the body and spirit neither require it nor demand it. If however, you want to experience the full joy of discovery and the pleasure of forging a solid creation of SELF, effort will be REQUIRED and rewarded. After the initial work is accomplished, then reconsider your dreams and your goals. Most of all fulfill your dreams by BECOMING: take care of your body and mind, grow intellectually and be committed to learning, embrace others with joy and laughter; lead and serve others socially and spiritually in your community, this society and beyond...  In closing, I sincerely hope that today you will proudly say: I AM a graduate of North Georgia College & State University: I am a biologist, a chemist, an artist, a teacher, a soldier, an officer and MORE... For today, you have completed a journey and acquired the necessary skills “TO BE.” Although many uncertain moments lie ahead, tomorrow you WILL continue to be recognized for your accomplishments because NGCSU is a well respected and very fine institution! Who you are and what you have accomplished today is your reward to your SELF! Who you become tomorrow will be your gift to all others!  Congratulations! May peace be with you always!

This page last modified on: Monday, 23 January 2006 16:40:10 -0500 by University Relations    

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